People

People in the city are very different from the campesinos I spent most of my time with in Guatemala, and the a priori that comes with meeting people from the city is that they are on the wealthier side of things and that our lives are not actually that different. Being in Xela sometimes also makes me forget I'm in Guatemala because of all the amenities and foodstuffs that are the same at home. But everytime I talk to people and hear where they're from and what they've lived through, I get a reality check. Leslie and I had a long conversation during the workshop because we weren't really doing anything, and she kind of told me her life story. Her mom left her father when she was 9 and her brother was 4. She went to live with another man as a result of marital tensions and infidelities. Only until Leslie was 16 did her mom decide to get back into her children's lives. When Leslie was 13 she went to the capital with her class and was supposed to see her mom for the first time in awhile because her mom worked in a maquiladora there, but she never showed up. It was really hard for her to deal with not having a mom, especially at that age when she really needed one. Leslie tried to kill herself when she was 10 by taking meds and was anorexic when she was 13, and suffered from depression all through her teens. When she was 16 and her mom reached out to her, she completely rejected her because she thought her mom ruined her life, but when she was 18, she decided to be the bigger person and give her mom a second chance, and now has a close relationship with her. Her brother still hates their mom though, and doesn't think he'll ever want to see her. Leslie is one of the smiliest outgoing people I've met here, and I never would've guessed that she's lived through all that. She's also a little bit fresa, or coquette, so I never would've guessed either that she's evangelical. She talks about how there are two paths in life, the one of god and the one of the world. She used to be in the path of the world and go out dancing and drinking and listen to music. But now she chose to follow the path of God so she can't do those things anymore, and doesn't really want to, although she does miss dancing and non religious music. She goes to church three times a week for mass and bible groups, and one of her only criteria for finding a boyfriend is that he be evangelical. I guess that ensures lower probabilities of him having addiction or infidelity problems, both common amongst guatemalan males. 

I've also gotten much closer with my host family and we talk a bunch, especially after meals, about everything and anything. Elvia, my host mom, has told me her life story too, and how she grew up. Elvia was kind of the Cinderella of her family. She was sent to live with her aunt to a far away school for being a boisterous little girl but was pulled out of school when she finished 6th grade to work. She didn't grow up with her parents so has barely any emotional connection to them, and when was sent back home, had to work to help pay for her sisters' education. Her mom taught her the very strict machista lifestyle: cook and clean, give food to your husband in bed, don't let men in the kitchen, don't stay out in the street because your place is the kitchen and the bedroom, don't talk, if your husband is cheating on you, just deal, pretend you don't know and everything is fine; suffer in silence, do what you're told, and live to serve your man. Elvia met Hugo though, and he completely changed her. He was also taught the machista ways by his father, but he chose not to build his family that way - I think the guerrilla helped him with that too. He taught Elvia that they were equals, pushed for her to continue studying, shared in home chores, and wanted her to codirect the spanish school with him. This took time for adaptation, and Elvia is the first in her family to live so progressively. Her sisters and aunts and mother disapprove of Hugo because he is from the coast, a campesino and less ladino, and probably envy their lifestyle, jealous of Elvia's happiness and lack of traditional womanly suffering. Unfortunately though, Elvia doesn't have a good relationship with her family. When she was really sick, no one came to help her, not even her mom, and they always talk. If there's one thing I learned from Guatemala it's that family is the most important thing and loving family relationships are the most solid bonds there are and that I'm extremely grateful and lucky for all the love and support I share with mine. That's what Elvia is fostering in the family she has with Hugo, David and Maria, but she relies only on them for support, and that's a lastima. 

 We also have long conversations about politics, governments, corruption and drug trafficking here, etc. My host dad Hugo has a pretty pessimistic world view, though he claims he's being realist. He's lived through quite a lot and has written a book. He was in the guerrilla in the 80s and after the war wanted to stay involved in the revolutionary party, the URNG, to shape political life of Guatemala. However, he said the URNG and his guerrilla member companeros changed and political life has corrupted them. He was offered to be minister several times apparently, but turned it down because of the rampant corruption and narcos complete manipulation of politics and government. He barely goes outside of his house anymore because of threats he's received while trying to fight for less corruption in Xela municipality - he created a plan for increased tourist security and against corruption and handed it to the director of human rights in the municipality; two weeks later, that guy was arrested for drug trafficking and corruption charges. 

He asked me if I thought there was love in the world, and I believe there is, but he immediately shot my opinion down to say that there isn't, and that if there was there wouldn't be war or exploitation or corruption. If people truly loved each other, then we wouldn't constantly be screwing over others for our own personal gains. However, there is some love left, and that's the only way our specie is surviving. He also maintains that all governments are corrupt, but the most corrupt and hypocrite one is the US government. I disagree with him, I don't think Obama's administration is bought by narcos, but he thinks it is, and that that's why there is so much drug trade and nothing is really being done about it. He thinks that's why the US government hasn't legalized marijuana - because the cartels are paying the government good money and if it's legal it won't be as profitable. What Hugo is saying is just not true and illogical, but he isn't used to having someone argue with him in his family and point out his errors, so  dialogue is slowly coming on rather than black-white preachiness. He calls the US the ultimate evil and ultimate violator and has quite a bit of anger toward the US, not without reason, but is completely focused on the negative and on the US's actions in the past rather than living in the present. As his son Hugo David pointed out to me yesterday, yes the US does terrible things and makes mistakes, but it's not all bad, and it's important to view the positive. We're here now, so let's remember the past but not let it hinder us to move forward. It's up to us, the future generation, to shape tomorrow's world, and nothing will improve if we stagnate in pessimism. Out of negativity can only come more negativity, but optimism and positivity opens all the doors to progress and betterment. For a sixteen year old, Hugo David is extremely wise, and he's probably one of the most cultured kids in Xela. Talking to him is always very interesting because of his extensive knowledge and passionate interest in literature, music, cinematography and the world. He's called weird by his reggaeton-girlhungry classmates, but I think they know like I do that it's people like Hugo David that inspire and enhance our humanity.